JewBu Quest: From Abuse to Happiness

JewBu: a Jew who practices forms of Buddhist meditation & spirituality. This blog documents my quest to 1) heal from sexual, verbal, and emotional abuse, 2) come to terms with losing Mom and Grandma to Alzheimers, 3) find balance, explore the spiritual, stay present. Bascially, I've experienced some pretty crappy shit in my life and want to find a way to move past it and find happiness.

Saturday, September 16, 2006

At Least We Have This Time Together

I think part of why I've been so upset and emotional these last few days is that I realize that when I come back to KC in December to move to her to the new facility, who knows where she'll be in the disease: This might be my last time with my mom. Last night, I arrived particuarly early and we went for a walk in the part next to her facility.

I told her: "Mom, a week from Sunday I'm going back to California." Mom: "That's okay. At least we have this time together." It was so sweet; it makes me want to cry.

After telling me that she'd make it up to visit with Mom last night, my sister showed up with her husband and two kids last night 1/2 hour before Mom likes to get ready for bed. One of the care managers told me that she pointed out to my sister how this will be on mom and that she'll have to come up a lot too. It felt good that the staff was recognizing how much I put into Mom's care and acknowledging that its a good thing.

The people that I work for back at school are treating me like crap all of a sudden and throwing all of this work my way (because THEY are behind in what THEY're supposed to be doing, so I'm expected to just pick it up on top of everything else I do for them). That's my plan for the day :( but I'm trying to remember that I'm lucky to have this job and focus on that.

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