JewBu Quest: From Abuse to Happiness

JewBu: a Jew who practices forms of Buddhist meditation & spirituality. This blog documents my quest to 1) heal from sexual, verbal, and emotional abuse, 2) come to terms with losing Mom and Grandma to Alzheimers, 3) find balance, explore the spiritual, stay present. Bascially, I've experienced some pretty crappy shit in my life and want to find a way to move past it and find happiness.

Saturday, May 20, 2006

My Father: This Is Why I'm So Messed Up With Relationships

My dad called to update me about stuff with my mom. At the end of the conversation, he asked how things are going with *A*. I said that things are fine. He kept pushing, and I reminded him that *A* and I are just friends. He kind of pushed me on that and then moved on to explain to me about how someone needs to be in charge in a relationship. In his relationship with my mom, he said, it was him in charge. In his brother's relationship, the roles are reversed. "Someone needs to be the leader," my dad said.

I told him that I'm not interested in bossing someone around, nor do I need someone to make decisions for me. He told me that partnerships don't work; someone needs to be in charge. I ended the conversation pretty quickly at that point and went to work out. My dad laughed that he had stressed me out so much with the conversation that I needed to go let go of the stress. YES!

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