Coughing Blood Today: Doctor Tomorrow

I spoke with my dad today briefly. When I asked him if he has an appointment to see the doctor, he said that he has one tomorrow morning. I asked if he wanted to make a list of his symptoms, and he said that right now there's only the blood in his speutem and the rapid weight loss.

Now, I haven't heard anything before about coughing up blood. Jeez, this is really serious. This is so classic lung cancer. Lung cancer has really horrible survival rate - only 13% of people diagnosed with lung cancer are alive after 5 years. I can't believe that both my parents dying. They're both in their early 60s.

Maybe I'm over-reacting about my dad, but this has been going on for months that he's been symptomatic, and people develop lung cancer for awhile before they get these kind of signs. And these aren't early lung cancer signs either. Plus, my dad keeps things from me, so I don't even know how bad things really are with him. At least he said today that he knows he needs to get a chest x-ray.

I feel really bad that I'm not there to go with him to the doctor; he has to go by himself. I'll have to make sure to call him around the time I think he'll get back. I also just emailed my lawyer to find out what kind of documents I have to get my dad to sign so that I can become my mom's caretaker if he goes first. I really can't believe this is happening. This has been the craziest horrible six months. I mean, my god. If my dad gets really sick, I am going to have no choice but to move back to Kansas City to take care of them, I think. I mean, my mom is so dependent upon seeing him every day and going out to dinner twice a week with him. She would really lose it if he died. She would be very upset if she picked up on him being physcially ill. I can't even let myself think like this, it is just hard to focus on anything else. I may have to in the next year take my mother to her mother's and her husband's funerals. My world is just completely upside down.

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