JewBu Quest: From Abuse to Happiness

JewBu: a Jew who practices forms of Buddhist meditation & spirituality. This blog documents my quest to 1) heal from sexual, verbal, and emotional abuse, 2) come to terms with losing Mom and Grandma to Alzheimers, 3) find balance, explore the spiritual, stay present. Bascially, I've experienced some pretty crappy shit in my life and want to find a way to move past it and find happiness.

Thursday, March 30, 2006

Cycles of Trauma

"There is no point in trying to shield ourselves from witnessing violence and violation; we couldn’t even if we wanted to. But we can act on the insight that witnessing violence and violation is harmful to us by learning more about how it affects our bodies, minds, relationships, communities, and world.” Kaethe Weingarten, Common Shock, p.18.

Flarebombs bloom on the dark sky.
A child clasps his hands and laughs.
I hear the sound of guns,
and the laughter dies.

But the witness
Remains

-- Thich Nhat Hanh

As I read, I realize that the murderer likely was suffering from PTSD, just like me. I read that she had fled from an abusive marriage. I wonder if she was always crazy or if the stress of experiencing the abuse drove her to aggression. The book I’m reading is talking about how those who experience aggression are more likely to be aggressive themselves. Can I stop the spiral of trauma or will it break me apart too?

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