JewBu Quest: From Abuse to Happiness

JewBu: a Jew who practices forms of Buddhist meditation & spirituality. This blog documents my quest to 1) heal from sexual, verbal, and emotional abuse, 2) come to terms with losing Mom and Grandma to Alzheimers, 3) find balance, explore the spiritual, stay present. Bascially, I've experienced some pretty crappy shit in my life and want to find a way to move past it and find happiness.

Saturday, April 29, 2006

Depression and Negative Coping Mechanisms

Well, so I picked up *A* last night, who was drunk and stranded downtown. We snuggled a bit and went for breakfast this morning. Then, he came with me to do some shopping for things for my mom, although I didn't find a lot. I have a lot of work to do, but I am honestly just really depressed right now. I can't believe what's going on. I can't believe that we're just throwing my mom in this place without knowing a lot about it and without Dad doing anything to help her adjust. He told someone there that he wouldn't even come visit her after he moves her in until the following Saturday. Then, he'll only come visit twice a week - Wednesdays and Saturdays - to take her out to dinner. I feel like my parents are getting a divorce, and Mom is being thrown aside now that she can't do anything for Dad anymore. How will I ever be able to trust anyone in a deep way after seeing my father betray my mom in this way?

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