JewBu Quest: From Abuse to Happiness

JewBu: a Jew who practices forms of Buddhist meditation & spirituality. This blog documents my quest to 1) heal from sexual, verbal, and emotional abuse, 2) come to terms with losing Mom and Grandma to Alzheimers, 3) find balance, explore the spiritual, stay present. Bascially, I've experienced some pretty crappy shit in my life and want to find a way to move past it and find happiness.

Friday, April 14, 2006

From Nighttime to Early Evening: Changing Triggers

Wow, I can't believe I didn't figure this out earlier. Dr. S was asking me about nighttime being a trigger. I pointed out that it starts now pretty early. When the sun goes down, I start to get anxious. I explained to her that I was raped while I was asleep, which is why nighttime has been a trigger for so long. BUT I completely forgot that the murders happened in the early evening and my neighbor's body was found in the early evening the next day. So, of course that is why the early evening is a trigger for me now. Both of those nights, I was just about to relax when these things happened. And so right when I'm about to relax in the early evening is when I get anxiety now, and sleeping is less of an issue. Of course. It seems so obvious. Maybe I should re-evaluate then taking a pill to help me sleep, get off of that, and put more attention on this new trigger of early evening.

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