JewBu Quest: From Abuse to Happiness

JewBu: a Jew who practices forms of Buddhist meditation & spirituality. This blog documents my quest to 1) heal from sexual, verbal, and emotional abuse, 2) come to terms with losing Mom and Grandma to Alzheimers, 3) find balance, explore the spiritual, stay present. Bascially, I've experienced some pretty crappy shit in my life and want to find a way to move past it and find happiness.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Good Day, Sunshine Part II

Though it was foggy when I woke up this morning, the sun is shining now. Jerry spent hours last night putting together this new computer (in parts) that he helped me pick out for around $400 including shipping. Its supposedly very fast and wonderful, and my old computer has a lot of glitches. It was sweet to see him spend his whole evening doing this thing for me. Of course, he still has to load all of the software onto it, and the whole thing is just sitting on my dining room table taking up a lot of space - but that's okay.

Things have been really great recently between Jerry and me. Clearly, he's making a very big effort from how things were before. Thanks to the idea from Joe, when Jerry's brother was here last weekend, I brought a hammer and big nails with me. He got embarrassed, I think, and I don't expect to hear any more of those comments.

I had a great time last Saturday at a cocktail party that a friend of mine threw at her house for her birthday. It was fun to get dressed up (I wore the dress from the wedding after finally getting the straps shortened so it fit me better), and I got a lot of positive attention from my lesbian friends acknowledging that I have a nice chest. It made me feel beautiful and sexy in ways which I hadn't in awhile.

Thursday is Jerry's birthday, and Friday I'll take him out to this amazing spa resort place he's wanted to go to -- for couple's massage, hanging out at the pool/spa area, and dinner at their top line restaurant.

I've got tons of work to do, but it feels good to be this productive. I am getting really amazing feedback so far on everything that I'm doing too - my research team asked me to be an author on this book chapter that they're getting published (deadline is July 1).

Also, I'm looking forward to the upcoming visit to Kansas City, to be able to see my mom. I called her a couple of days ago, and she was so excited when I told her I was coming. I stayed on the phone with her (its cordless) while she tried to find a staff member to return it to. She just kept humming and singing to herself ("I'm glad you're coming"..."I'll talk to you later."). It was very cute; I'm glad that she's able to comfort herself. On not so happy news though - Dad noticed that someone had ripped the mezzuzah off her door and the scroll is completely gone! Dad is really upset that someone would do that, but I'm at least happy that he went to replace it and got a kosher scroll. (When Mom moved in, he said she didn't need a mezzuzah at all, so I had to take care of it.)

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6 Comments:

Blogger Gail Rae said...

Up and down and up again...I like both the downs and ups in your journal, Karma...feels like life!

Wednesday, June 13, 2007 11:41:00 AM  
Blogger tafka PP said...

Er- I think you'll fine it wasn't Joe who suggested hammer and nails... and I can't believe you actually did it, I was joking!!

Thursday, June 14, 2007 5:57:00 AM  
Blogger Karma said...

ah, I'm sorry to not giving you credit. I wasn't going to do it, but Jerry loved the idea! It was funny!! :)Thanks PP

Thursday, June 14, 2007 10:59:00 AM  
Blogger Marj aka Thriver said...

glad Jerry is making the effort. You are so worth it, of course. I hope the couple massage was amazing and relaxing.

Monday, June 18, 2007 2:03:00 PM  
Blogger Karma said...

It was amazing and relaxing. One of my favorite moments was turning over and watching Jerry getting massaged -- there's something very sweet and bonding about it. Plus, just get massaged is pretty amazing in and of itself.

Monday, June 18, 2007 3:08:00 PM  
Blogger Shari said...

Oh, the roller coaster is going up...I hope it stays up there for a while. A guy who would put together a computer for you has got to be a keeper. I am glad that things are smoother between you two now.

And great to hear that your mom is excited that you are going to be visiting her soon.

Monday, June 18, 2007 8:29:00 PM  

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