Appreciation and Procrastination

Well, I should be doing work for my research team, but I'm having a hard time concentrating. I find it really therapudic to write this blog, especially since I know that there are people out there reading it (at least that's what the counter says). I mean look down at that counter; this page has been opened almost 60 times! Sometimes, I have a hard time connecting with people when I get PTSD stuff, so knowing that there are people (who I do and don't know) reading this...I don't know, it just makes me feel connected. I know that this has got to be hard on my friends who I gave the blog address to, to see that I'm having such a hard time. I think its really good for me though to be just letting everything out, not holding back, not caring if you judge me or feel sorry for me. I'm just going to be myself here, for all the world to see. And then I can get connected hopefully with this Buddhist notion that my attachment to myself and my suffering isn't necessary; it is just an illusion.