JewBu Quest: From Abuse to Happiness

JewBu: a Jew who practices forms of Buddhist meditation & spirituality. This blog documents my quest to 1) heal from sexual, verbal, and emotional abuse, 2) come to terms with losing Mom and Grandma to Alzheimers, 3) find balance, explore the spiritual, stay present. Bascially, I've experienced some pretty crappy shit in my life and want to find a way to move past it and find happiness.

Friday, February 09, 2007

Angry With Jerry

Jerry and I made open plans earlier this to do something both tonight and tomorrow night. Tomorrow night, he even mentioned an interest in bringing me to meet his brother. Last minute, he told me that this conference he's going to is going to last until 9pm tonight. I was a bit annoyed, but decided to be flexible and made plans to go to services with friends. It is 9:30 now, and I haven't heard a word from Jerry. I had emailed him telling him that services end around 8:30, and I am honestly really frustrated and angry that he hasn't even contacted me, even though I sent him a text message 15 minutes ago.

I had dressed up nicely in particular for him, but it was somewhat uncomfortable, and not knowing what our plans are or if we're even going to end up doing something tonight, I put on my pajamas and am going to try to get some thesis work done before putting in a movie. I am just overly sensitive about this, I think, because the last guy that I dated was constantly standing me up, and that ended up being the end to our relationship - I laid a ground rule to not make plans with me and then stand me up; he did; I called him on it; I never heard from him again. And Wednesday when Jerry and I had plans, he didn't show up at my house until after 10pm, messing with my whole sleep schedule. I am really enjoying being with Jerry, but jeez this is really exhausting. And I'm not even sure what to do about tonight. I guess I just do my own thing and when he calls me eventually, tell him that I'm mad. Its 9:40; grrr!

I do somewhat fear that since we've been dating about a month, I may be hitting my dating hump - by this I mean none of my relationships ever last past this one month mark.

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4 Comments:

Blogger Gail Rae said...

Float, Karma...just float...

Saturday, February 10, 2007 11:02:00 AM  
Blogger Karma said...

I may make that my mantra for the day.

Saturday, February 10, 2007 11:06:00 AM  
Blogger tafka PP said...

I might take that one too...

So---- what happened?

Sunday, February 11, 2007 5:36:00 AM  
Blogger Karma said...

I just posted about it!

Monday, February 12, 2007 3:56:00 PM  

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