Disappointing Doctors
I had an appointment today with a doctor at student health that I made a month ago to meet with one of their only female doctors on staff. She said that my test results are normal and then asked me a bunch of really personal questions and then said that I should just tweak how I'm handling the low blood sugar and sent me on my way.
I feel really manipulated right now. Why were those questions relevant? Clearly, she's going to use them to describe why my situation is psychosomatic and put into my chart instead of spending any time explaining to me why it is that I'm suddenly dealing with these hypoglycemic symptoms, what's going on with the migraines, or anything. I asked at the end, "so you think this is all due to stress?" And, she sort of responded in the affirmative but everything was very vague.
I even went in with a list of my symptoms, an overview of what I've done, and questions. But, she didn't seem interested in any of this other than letting me tell her like half of the symptoms. She also told me to drink juice when I get low blood sugar which is the OPPOSITE of what the dietitian told me - juice (unless I'm in a serious emergency) is going to make my sugar spike up and then drop back down too fast.
I'm also just feeling sort of an awe/confusion about what happened with Jerry. I keep waiting for him to call and apologize for real. I can't believe that its just over, just like this, with him being totally fine being a jerk and clearly blaming me for everything (even him being a jerk).
Augh augh augh! I'm not getting a lot of work done. I am having a hard time getting into it. In a little bit, I'm going to get a pedicure with friend (aka my ex girlfriend) before she leaves tomorrow to do research in another country. I also got the schedule for adult ed classes through the community college and put a bunch of stuff into my schedule (although nothing starts for weeks) of possibilities to do - I left it very open, I'll take whatever feels interesting at the time - a cooking class, an art class, a random lecture here or there.
*A* stopped by yesterday to pick up his mail. It was annoying that he didn't want to hang out and getting him to talk about how things are going for him and the relationship was like pulling teeth. Plus, we made no plans to hang out, not even for my birthday (which is on the 22nd by the way, but I'll be in Kansas City). Whatever.
I'm making efforts to get out more and connect with more people. It is hard work and sometimes honestly not so fun because I'm just kinda shy with new people. I know that I just have to take it one step at a time, and I'll keep trying to do that.
ALSO - fyi to my loyal readers - I just saw that there were like 8 comments from the past year at random times that somehow got lost in the system. I never received notification anywhere that they were in the system until I logged in today (and I login all the time). So, if for some reason you had posted a comment and it hadn't shown up, I'm REALLY sorry. I do really appreciate all the comments left here.
BUT, I've just reached 10,000 hits to this site. So, I appreciate everyone's support with this blog! Thanks!
Oh, and so what will I do about the health stuff? I'm going to go see a homeopath locally. Its going to cost me $500 just for the first visit and is not at all covered by insurance. But, clearly, I'm not going to get anywhere with doctors, and I'm ready to find some way to heal from these migraines and hypoglycemic issues.
Labels: connecting with others, doctors, emotions, health